My first task to the reader is to find out the address of your nearest Magistrates Court using the Internet. Well, I couldn't do it directly but found the address as a side effect of something else. In addition, the rules of engagement are (said the woman on the phone) that you must turn up between 9:30 and 9:45 of a morning.
So I turned up at 9:30 and asked for the Certification service. The two attendants couldn't decide between them whether the court did that or not but the pair settled on the woman's determined stance that it was a second floor issue although they were quite convinced it was a 10-4 service not the explicit 15 minute window I'd been quoted.
Interrupted by a phone call from Thomas Cook to say that some of the flight tickets had arrived (hurray!) I went back into reception at about twenty to ten and speculatively inquired that this really was the Magistrates Court, I wasn't in the wrong place, was I?
It's a surprisingly long way between Reading County Court and the Magistrates Court, a good job I'm a fit young man although I can't honestly recommend running great distances in hiking boots. So, pouring with sweat I entered the queue to go through the metal detector. All of us reprobates have to empty our pockets of everything remotely metallic, in my case, including my penknife, and shuffle through whereas several smartly dressed people waved at the staff, jumped the queue and set the machine off. What's the point? They don't care what the staff are carrying and let me through with my penknife anyway.
Never mind, I'm now in the queue for reception. It reminded me very much of the queue you get in a Post Office where there's only one person on duty and every customer needs a full explanation of each type of delivery service available to them before deciding to send a awkward item via the system with the most form filling required.
Anyway, my turn came: Hello, luv.
Uh?
Er, sorry, I
didn't, um... How can I help?
Recovering my senses I was given
directions to the Court Offices. The woman behind reception in the
Court Office asked if she could help: I'd like some documents
certified, please.
Have you made an appointment?
Nnmph!
Aargh! Why didn't you tell me this on the phone?
So, back again tomorrow for the rather imposing task of facing a Justice of the Peace at 9:30 in the morning.
Dr. Higgins at Townlands Hospital in Henley was very good this
afternoon. After a couple of round-about questions about family
history of diabetes (eh?) the scabby thing on my leg turns out to be
"round" eczema and the fungal cream prescribed back in June has been
useless. Here, take this and it should clear up in about 10
days.
I do have to pop back in tomorrow for a blood test just in case it is diabetes related although she did say it was very unlikely in a fit and healthy young man like myself. (Thanks very much!)
Copyright 2002 Ian Fitchet. All rights reserved.